Last

This will be my last post on this blog. I may or may not start another one at some unknown time in some unknown future. There are many things I didn’t post on; sex, drugs, rock and roll, the church, everyday happenings. But thats not important, in fact not too much of anything is too terribly important. What is important is Life. People forget to live sometimes, they get involved with everyday and forget to look up, look around and… fucking smile just to smile, laugh because the world is there running in its little gerbil ball around the sun and we’re along for the ride or cry or just stand there and feel your heart beat. I’m talking about being alive not just living, people all over just live, its boring and it kills. There is a quote that floats around, says “live life to its fullest” we forget the important part of that sentence ‘live life’! “Be here now” “Live in the moment”, once again the beginning of those sentences is the important part ‘Be’, ‘Live’. People need to pull their head out of their collective asses and smell the fucking roses! I guess my last post is to be a rant and not a very good one at that. Life is all we have on this earth, its Gods gift that we, of all the animals, can recognise it and enjoy it, sadly we can also destroy it or worse forget about it.

There was a man standing there with a far and distant stare I asked him what he was looking at at and he said shhhh so I took a silent step back, in time he bowed to the horrizon turned and walked away, I smiled, I didn’t expect to see God today.

And so ends this wonderful experiment/experience thank you for your patients.

My Catharsis

If I write everyday It keeps demons at bay.

Livin’ a lie
Hopin’ to fly
Away
To a place called home

Information is God… …or is it Knowledge?
…Is Knowledge Wisdom or is Experience?
What is God.

Nervous Tick (le)

Bad Habit=Lewd Nun

Scribble Scribble
Seems the same. From up here.
Well down here. It’s better.

Ideas/Thoughts on paper are so much better than in the head; they don’t jumble about as much. On paper they reach a steady state, immobile & clean. A specimen that can be examined and corrected.

agitated

I feel agitated, upset at the past. I feel helpless and lost, I feel impotent. I am nagged by a sensation that I missed what I was supposed to, that I missed what I could have and settled for something less. I feel there is magic in the world and that I am too mundane to see it. I feel heartbroken and failed. I feel old but I was born only yesterday.

Well that was depressing… So Be It!

I think I may be too empathetic. Pathetic being the operational word. I’m cynical and hard, compromised and solid. I am an everchanging Rock. My heart is as open-wide as my eyes. My heart is hardened and my soul was/is pure. The journey is long but we don’t care to think on the destination; the destination will get here when it will, without our help. On the road I decided to travel through the fields, in the fields I found my way back to the road, from there I went to swim in the river to fetch up on an unknown beach. Through this wilderness then I travel, fearless and afraid. I had a map for the road but I left it when I left it. Back before the fields in the land of sunrises and promises.

And the root of the problem is: “I don’t Know”.

Do I need to know though?

I don’t know.

1of2 unfinished. Same topic

I am a Porcupine
a Prickly pear
Did not mean to be
But its for my safety

First I built walls
But I couldn’t get out
I lived in a glass house
It broke
I ran to the Hills
I just got lost

So better to be Prickly                            Than remote
People still get Close
Then they don’t

Being a porcupine is easier
I can get close
W/out touch or contacting
I can insulate w/out Disappearing

life’s story, or “it’s karma.”

Life is our own story. More often then not we write our own way, our own end, with the things we say, the things we do and the way we play. Naughty or nice, mean or fair, your actions, your future. Karma is real and will circle back; what was yours to give will be given again. You just might be on the receiving end. Don’t think that you can get away by just living or being a good boy day after day. Your life is written by your thoughts as well, they are loud and we can hear them I’m ashamed to tell. That deep overflowing aquifer that is your soul wells up and spits up your thoughtactions. What you think you may as well do, it is after all the real you. Striped of all masks and makeup, no masquerade or magic, no hiding behind the curtain of false smiles and empty promises; what matters, the real you, is whats in the heart, that mask does not fool. The universe sees true intent and will not let you get away with it. Black your heart, then black you life. You are what you are, what you choose to be and in the end what you face will be you, what you are, what you were. There is an accounting taking place and even if you are behind a mask, God can still see your face.

Anti-Eutopia

Notice how in the books “Fahrenheit 451″,  “1984″, “Brave New World”, “Repent Harlequin, Said The Tick-Tock Man” the revolutionary is on the inside? Always it seems that the inside man sees more than the general populace. This is a true statement; he is a better position to see what the sheep cannot. He is defeated in the end by the society he so recently upheld, but still there is a hope for the reader that maybe he effected a change, maybe his small actions started a chain reaction… A small hope to be sure, but hope non-the-less. I think that this is the point of these books, to bring awareness to our condition and inspire us to move. Hope is essential for any revolutionist, hope and belief. If a man does not believe what he is doing is right, why do it? If he has no passion, no spirit, he is just going through the motions. In the movie “Serenity” Shepherd Book told the main character that he did not care what just so long as he believed. A man must have a drive if he is to survive as anything but a cog in a machine, he must have a passion, a firm belief. A man who believes is hard to dissuade. So, what is it that is right to believe? Is it right to side with the society that is, quote-unquote, oppressing the people or side with the rogue, the maverick? Well that depends… What are your beliefs?